Buying for the dopamine
On money guilt, dopamine hits, and a very real psychological reason behind it all.
Older coworkers and parents love to talk about how impulsive our generation is.
We’re materialistic. We’re selfish. We over-consume. Depending on who you ask, we’re either hopelessly indulgent or just plain dumb.
I used to believe them. I worked on Wall Street. I should’ve known better, right?
And yet I still impulsively spent most paychecks and hated myself for it. I just assumed it was my own personal flaw. Something I needed to grow out of or discipline my way through.
But then I read The Psychology of Money (wasn’t as boring as it sounds). It explained how every generation has a different relationship with money depending on what economic events they lived through, and when they lived through them. It didn’t explicitly talk about the topic I’m about to dive into, but it prompted me to look deeper into a possible solution (or excuse for my parents and coworkers) as to why we are the way that we are. So guess what I did?
If you guessed that I asked Chat, bingo! (No, she didn’t write this piece. I love writing. But yes, I use her confidently for research.)
ANYWAY. That’s when I stumbled on a term that explained exactly what my brain had been doing every time I impulsively double tapped to buy.
Temporal discounting is our tendency to prefer short-term rewards over long-term ones, especially when the future feels uncertain.
We watched our parents stress during the 2008 financial crisis.
We lost internships and job offers during COVID.
We graduated into an economy that doesn't really make room for us.
And now, just as we’re finding our footing, we’re seeing half the workforce replaced by AI and the other half seemingly becoming millionaires overnight on socials.
Most of us are navigating adulthood with inconsistent income, inflated costs of living, and a constant stream of targeted ads that know exactly when we’re vulnerable.
So yeah, our brains choose the dopamine hit we will get from buying that ad now.
A purchase that reminds us, for a second, that we have control. We can’t comprehend putting money aside in a retirement account to take out when were 60 years old… I don’t know where I’ll be or what money i’ll need next week, let alone 30 + years from now.
Please don’t take this as a green light to impulsively spend every paycheck.
But take it as a sign to not drown in guilt for being “bad with money.”
This isn’t about self-control. When your brain feels panicked or uncertain, it enters safety mode.
And in a world where the future feels slippery, spending offers a quick, reliable hit of dopamine, aka fake safety. False certainty. But certainty nonetheless.
As I write this I am realizing temporal discounting probably has something to do with our addiction to social media too. But that’s another article.
Understanding the psychology behind my spending helped me forgive myself.
And if that’s where you are, mid spiral, or mid scroll, I hope this helps you forgive yourself too.
Your brain isn’t broken, It’s just reacting to the world around it.
And now you’ve got a name for it.
Temporal discounting. Tell your dad.